Just a few random tid-bits. Awkward and always awesome, as is my life.

-If you can't tell from the picture, this is my belly, lopsided and huge. Apparently I'm giving birth to a beaver because Marlo is a serious burrower. My belly stays like this most of the time and it never gets less weird to me. What is she trying to do in there, hibernate for winter?
-Physical exams at the doctor. I'm sorry, you're going to stick that where? Oh! And you're going to take some blood after? Well, that's just super.
-All of the shoes that I own that seem to be shrinking because my feet couldn't possibly be growing. Nawwww... no way, no how.
-Constipation (come on now, we allll poop). But seriously, my bathroom happenings while pregnant have brought an entirely new level of intimacy to my relationship. I get hi-fives a lot lately.
-A college-aged guy in Vegas asking me how far along I was and I dead-panned that I wasn't pregnant. He looked absolutely mortified. But it was my free entertainment of the day. And don't get all 'that wasn't very nice' on me. I was in Vegas. Pregnant. I had to have a little bit of fun.
-This isn't awkward or awesome but more of a 'seriously?!' moment. In Vegas, my boss wanted to place a fun little bet. We went to the Roulette table and I insisted black-29. I had a feeling. He put twenty on just black- no number- because it was the easier bet. So, what do you think it lands on? Black. Freaking. Twenty-Nine. We would've won 700 bucks. Seriously?!?! And I'd like to note that this was my first time ever placing a bet in Vegas. Beginner's luck?
-Me. On a treadmill. Running.
-Macaroni and cheese from a box. What is in that powder exactly? And why is it so damn good?
-Have you ever looked at the 'people' that are drawn in the Ikea furniture direction manuals? Awkward...
-The women who insist on telling me their horror birth stories. Why? Why!!
-The dog that I grew up with has to wear a doggy diaper now. And no, I'm not kidding. She's 14 and some change and has a little incontinence problem. And, yes, it's as funny looking as you'd think it is.

That's all.

Happy Tuesday.


David said...

did the doctor say, "Well, this is a sassy one..."?


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