i forgot what taking a long walk outside by myself felt like without pushing a stroller or hearing a toddler cry because she dropped her apple one hundred yards back and i failed to notice until the tears and tantrum began.
i forgot what it was like to be able to run errands, clean my house, write a post, catch up on emails, prep a few lunch items for the week, watch the news and even exercise all on my own time without a toddler under my feet.
i forgot what it felt like to sip an iced coffee on a random tuesday and actually take the time to taste it. it tastes like bitter, velvety heaven, in case you were wondering.
and while i feel like i should really be taking a nap or a shower instead of doing all of the things that i'm in the process of doing or have done in the few hours since i dropped marlo off at her first day of play school, i'm finding that completing these "chores" are bringing me an unexpected level of satisfaction.
maybe it's the change in seasons that is encroaching on me and my family. maybe it's the simple fact that marlo's newfound independence makes me a very proud mama, like joe and i have done something incredibly right over the last two and a half years. hell, it could simple be because i've finally got some consistent alone time for three mornings every week.
i'm not quite sure.
then again, i'm not quite sure that i need to be sure of why as much as i need to just be sure of what is.
because whatever the reasons may be, i'm feeling so, so very good and it's been a really long time since i've been able to say that.