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| the MEEMS! |
2. my husband is a very intense and competitive ping-pong player. note to self: do not ever stand in the line of ping-pong fire. his aim is also stellar, as the welt on my stomach can now vouch.
3. i'm still trying to figure out this managing a writing gig and still being a stay-at-home mama thing. how do mamas work from home without nannies? tell me, HOW?! my kid throws things at my face if i'm not fully invested in the gibberish that she speaks to me all day and she will literally grab my face and pull it two inches away from hers and continue talking if i don't look directly at her. and it should be noted that my brain doesn't function past six pm so, please, don't tell me that you do all of your work at night. that just isn't an option for me. night time is reserved for drinking wine, sex, and pinterest.
4. i'm over this sweaty, soupy weather. fuck it. just fuck it. i'm ready for falling leaves, snuggling with cashmere, and motorcycle boots. and leather! this humidity and ball-sweat-grossness needs to stop it already. you summer lovers can keep it. i want none of it. all good things happen in october anyway.
5. and while we're on the topic of fall, since july, i've heard countless people counting down until starbucks releases their pumpkin spice latte. i tried it again this weekend (year number five) and it was just as bad as the first time. it sounds really great in theory. you know, "wrap your hands around fall-in-a-cup!" but it's just bad. really, really bad. i'm of the school of thought that coffee should taste like coffee. with a touch of almond or coconut milk in it, of course. (i used to prefer whole milk before all of this no dairy nonsense.) same goes for beer. beer should taste like beer, not like a jack-o-lantern made love to some burnt leaves.
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