'life is short, but sweet for certain.' -dmb |
when we were just a block away from home i paused for a moment, looked down, and admired my view- the view of my sweet babe and her chubby toes, her crossed ankles, her enviable long black eyelashes, and her deep olive skin. as i was staring down at my baby, i became completely overwhelmed at just how much i love her. i tried to hurry home before i lost it but my legs wouldn't- couldn't- move quickly enough. so i stopped and took a seat on a brick stoop and sobbed myself into an embarrassing stupor on a random sidewalk of manhattan.
the past two months have been difficult. three extended family members have been lost. i don't want to go into the circumstances involved for privacy of my family. but death is difficult regardless of the reasons why or how it happens, isn't it? death hits you in the gut, making you realize just how precious life is. it makes you achingly aware of just how much you love certain people and what you would give in order to never feel the pain of losing them.
on our walk yesterday, i felt the weight and magnitude of the love that i have for this little girl and what it might feel like to lose her. this little girl and her wild spirit make life all the more sweet and precious and i can't imagine living without it. yes, i know it's a morbid thought, but it's also a necessary one. i believe that we occasionally need these reminders; that punch in the gut that slaps us out of whatever funk that has us feeling sorry for ourselves and brings us back into the moment- that extremely precious moment where my little girl was puckering up for a kiss because she knew my tears warranted one.
so out of my funk, i am.
back to reality, we are.
and off i am to cuddle twenty-five pounds of beautiful baby girl.
1 comments:
perfect sentiments.
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