thoughts on motherhood

a protector. a lover. a mother.
and fifteen weeks pregnant.

my job isn't to never fail; my job is to show my babies how to be humans, how to fail gracefully, and how to pick themselves back up after they fall. because they will fall.


my job isn't to shield them from ever getting hurt; my job is to remind them that remaining vulnerable in a hardened world is still the most beautiful way to approach and embrace the beauty that life offers us.


my job isn't to be perfect or to measure up to anyone else's idea of who i should be; my job is to remain authentic to who i want to be, who i am at my best, and to teach my babies that differences are what make us beautifully human.


my job isn't to tell them who i think they should be; my job is to embrace, respect, and appreciate their individuality, who they want to be, and their path to becoming that person. my job is to love them without conditions.


my job isn't to be selfless or a martyr or a doormat. my job is to believe in my self-worth and to distinguish that thin line between selflessness and selfishness so that my kids never become complacent with their own needs coming second.


my job isn't to not need others. my job is to believe so much in my own abilities that i don't repeatedly rely on the opinions of others to build me up or to be my backbone.


my job isn't to shelter them or to guard them from the pitfalls of life no matter how badly i'll want to; my job is to make sure that my kids know how to kick life's ass when life is being as asshole.


my job is to protect them, to love them, and to show up.



that is my job as a mother.