in my opinion | here is one thing that i know

12.02.2013

a tribe of brooklyn babes loving each other like their mamas love each other.
ps. marlo was each of these boys first kiss. a little heartbreaker in the making...
one thing that i know for certain is that we teach our children how to love.

children are born needing love to survive. it's a human instinct: to need and to give love. it's when children grow up and become an active participant in the real world that they are even made aware of anything else as an option. but a child's idea of normal starts at home, with the people they are around most often. when our babies see us loving each other, loving the children of other mamas as our own, when they see us supporting one another unconditionally and being kind to strangers, they grow up to have genuine affection for humanity. when they see us being open-minded, non-judgemental, and forgiving, they not only grow up to be a kind and open soul, they grow up expecting that in return from other people.

if there is one thing that i want marlo to take from me- which, is something that i took from my mother growing up- it is to never give up on love. i never want marlo's sarcasm or cynicism to turn into bitterness. bitterness is a dangerous path to lead oneself down because it's so hard to turn around and come back from. it leads to jealousy, pettiness, cruelty, and a level of immaturity that i will not allow in my home or in my life.

i'm not ignorant enough to think that one can be immune to heartbreak. i know that it happens because i've experienced it. i've been completely broken by it. i've been crushed so badly to the point that i questioned whether or not loving another person was worth feeling so low when that love didn't cooperate. and this isn't just in regards to romantic relationships. losing a relative, a friendship ending, finding out that someone isn't who you thought they were... those can break one's heart, too. and they have broken mine many times over.

i fear this day more than anything but i know that marlo will feel that pain, too. it's inevitable. it's life. she will lose people, she will have her heart broken. someone will hurt her. but i never want marlo to give up on love. i never want her to lose hope in people, relationships, friendships, or family. love is what it's all about. when you get down to the bottom line, love is what we all have to offer people.

4 comments:

Taylor Primeaux said...

I love this.

Barbie // Fringe & Feathers said...

I love this. It's all we can hope for as mamas...that we give our children enough love and a stable grounding so that they can navigate the pain and heartbreak they will inevitably face later in life. I just wonder how as a mother you cope with watching your kids face any kind of pain or disappointment. It breaks me just thinking of it.

ss said...

I recently read Ramona a book called "Someday" and in it a mother lays out her dreams for her young daughter. One of the pages read, "Someday, you will hear something so sad that you will fold up with sorrow." I bawled on the spot. The whole book had me crying. It was beautiful. Thinking of our babies going through those points of sorrow and misery... it's unbearable, but showing them unyielding love will give them what they need to get through it. Just like we all did. We got through it. xo (loved this post!)

Henna | HENNA BLOSSOM BLOG said...

This is such a beautiful post. We can't really control much in this life but if there's anything we can give our children, it's a strong & open heart. Love this. You're such a gorgeous woman and obviously an amazing mama.

 

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