How to Make a Person Go Mad...

First, take a semi-sane (albiet very pregnant) adult woman. Make her debit card magically fall out of her closed wallet and ever so conveniently into the escalator slats at the mall and become ripped to fucking shreds. Time this to happen particularly when she's attempting to go eat a BLT because baby is craving bacon and bread.  Send said woman to waddle her big ol' ass into the bank. Make her wait twenty minutes to see a customer service representative. Tell the moron representative to inform her that she'd have to order a replacement card over the phone instead of in-person because, as it turns out, customer service representatives don't handle things like customer service at their branch locations.

At this point, consider the woman slightly agitated.

Then, just for good measure, make it an automated phone call with a fake British woman who understands absolutely nothing that comes out of the woman's mouth.

Finally, stand back and watch the entertainment that is a day-shy-of-40-weeks-pregnant-hormonal female going absolutely apeshit and scream at a phone, giving the Brit the name Aster because that's the only British name she can think of in the heat of the moment. Also, listen to her as she points out the irony in the banks decision to use a British accent for their automation services. It's a bank that has AMERICA in it's title.



One can only hope that this person will not be teaching her child how to handle frustration or how to behave when things don't go her way.