five things | fuck some snow

1. i haven't met a mother here in new york who is happy about this situation. rather, we all agree that ramming our faces into a wall would be a better option than another fucking snowflake hitting the ground. our toddlers are going nuts and so are we. fuck some snow.

2. tomorrow the low is one. as in one single degree. fuck some snow.

3. every time i send a photo to one of my friends back in NC, they always say, "oh, it's so pretty!" no the fuck it isn't. sure, it's what most refer to as pretty as it's falling from the sky. but the moment that shit hits the brooklyn sidewalks, it turns grey or yellow. dirt or dog pee stained snow. not so pretty now, huh? fuck some snow.

4. i miss jorts. i miss vitamin d. i miss dining al fresco. i miss rosé being in stock at my local wine store (apparently it's a seasonal wine. says who?) i miss bronze skin that's littered with freckles. i miss humidity. i miss better skin and hair days. i miss being outside. i miss seeing skin. fuck some snow.

5. picture this scenario: middle of summer and it's schwetty-balls hot. you've been outside for a long while, your cheeks are pink and your brow is glistening (southern girls don't sweat, we glisten.) and as you walk into a air-conditioned room, your face is hit with that glorious coolness. it's an amazing feeling, am i right? like you didn't realize how hot it was until you felt the sweet relief of a high electricity bill. now picture the opposite: you're chilled to the bone. it's the kind of cold that hits you deep down in your bones. no amount of layers makes it even remotely better and you still have to be outside to go on your daily errands. you're huffing it all over the city and then you walk into a dry-heated small apartment and you immediately can't get your clothes off fast enough because you hadn't realized that you were actually sweating underneath your forty-seven layers of flannel and down. it's not pleasurable or relieving. it's painful on top of a bitter torture of seasonal winter attitude. fuck some snow.