just file this under weird

9.12.2013

right as i was sitting down to eat lunch and do some work, i received this text message. naturally, it freaked me out a bit. so, i searched around and peered out of our windows to see if someone was watching me. no one. at least, that i could find.

but since someone was so curious, i am currently eating a big ol' bowl of pretentiousness straight from gwyneth paltrow's kitchen: spicy roasted cauliflower with shaved raw fennel, chopped scallions, and wheat berries with lemon and spanish extra virgin olive oil drizzled all over it.

so, weirdo, i do not want to trade you for your baby carrots and kindergarten sammy. you don't even have ranch dressing for dipping and i'd bet my calorie count for the day that your sandwich is made of kraft singles, too. amateur. did your mommy leave a post-it in there, too?

4 comments:

the communal closet said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

I just LOLed at my desk. As much as everyone loves to hate Gwynnie, I do think her recipes rock.

Anonymous said...

epic.

Unknown said...

WHAT YAEGERPACK SAID...

 

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